Becoming an elder is not just about age; it’s about growth, self-awareness, and the confidence to trust in your own knowledge. Life has a way of teaching us lessons, sometimes subtly and sometimes with force, but it’s how we process and apply these lessons that shapes who we become. The journey toward self-trust and evolving beyond average relational thinking is not easy, but it’s deeply rewarding.
For much of my life, I sought advice from others—family, friends, mentors, even casual acquaintances—believing that their insights were superior to my own instincts. After all, they often spoke with conviction, authority, and an air of wisdom. But as time went on, I began to notice a pattern: not all advice was good advice. In fact, some of the guidance I received came from people who, in hindsight, were not qualified to give it. They weren’t malicious or intentionally misleading; they simply didn’t know what they didn’t know.
This realization was both humbling and liberating. I started to see that confidence and eloquence do not equate to expertise. Some people are masters of sounding knowledgeable, using their tone and delivery to convey certainty, even when their actual understanding is shallow. They don’t necessarily intend harm, but their advice can still lead you astray if you take it at face value.
It took years of self-reflection and lived experience to see through this. I began to trust my instincts more and rely less on the opinions of others. This wasn’t a rejection of community or collaboration—far from it. Instead, it was an acknowledgment of my own capacity to assess situations and make decisions based on my unique perspective. Through trial and error, I learned that my intuition, honed by life’s lessons, was often more reliable than the advice of those who simply knew how to package their words.
Does this newfound self-trust make me qualified to give advice? Absolutely not, and that’s the crux of this message. Not everyone who offers guidance is worth listening to, and even those who are wise may not have the context or understanding to address your specific situation. The key is discernment. Listen, yes, but always weigh what you hear against your own knowledge and instincts.
To those with strong minds and constitutions, I offer this piece of advice: trust your gut. Your life experiences have equipped you with tools and insights that no one else possesses. While others’ perspectives can be valuable, they should never override your own judgment. Be wary of those who speak with too much certainty, especially if their advice feels disconnected from your reality. Confidence is not the same as competence.
As I’ve grown into myself, I’ve found a profound sense of clarity and empowerment. This doesn’t mean I have all the answers—far from it. But it does mean I’m no longer easily swayed by the opinions of others. I’ve learned to respect my own wisdom, and in doing so, I’ve discovered a deeper connection to who I truly am.
So, as you navigate your own journey, remember this: trust yourself. Your instincts, shaped by your unique path, are often your most reliable guide. That’s not just advice—it’s a truth I’ve come to live by.
